Poor women. Like it isn’t hard enough without living with the Madonna-Whore Complex.

Somewhere, somebody decided that there are two types of us.

The Madonnas

& the Whores.

Definitions

The Madonna is the Mother of Jesus. A victim of immaculate conception. A virgin and a saint that does not debase herself to the world of earthly pleasures. She is the wife, the mother, the saintly woman.

The Whore is just that – a whore. A prostitute. The seat of men’s desires. Someone you wouldn’t want to be associated with in daylight or polite society.

The Problem

Unfortunately, you can only be one. “Today, the Madonna-whore dichotomy ultimately means that women have to be either pure and ‘virginal’ or sexual and forthcoming. Never both.” (The Latch)

Or so it seems?

The recent female sexual reclamation has been striving to create a mix, a blend, a morph of the two. A whore and a saint. A woman.

In my opinion, you cannot exist in your full expression as a human being if you keep compartmentalizing yourself into little boxes. True happiness, beauty, and art comes from owning your full self.

Because in reality The Madonna is a woman who says no to her desires and fulfills everyone else’s wishes before her own. Imagine, a worn down Anne, running from one activity to another, never saying no. Dropping her kids off at soccer practice just to run home and cook dinner in time for her family to come home. She’s scared of confrontation and rarely speaks her mind. The last time she orgasmed was in college. Her life looks perfect, but she’s filled with resentment and un-lived dreams.

Jessica, who’s moved past the Complex and owns her Whoreness, on the other hand, does what she thinks is best for herself. She lives from a place of full pleasure. She works out in the morning and has her husband take the kids to school. Jessica orders take out 3 out of 7 nights to lessen the load and hires a dog walker. She has a standing self pleasure practice and orgasms every day. Jess has a blog where she expressed all her current opinions, regardless of people’s opinions. She’s uninhibited and only spends time with people that make her feel good.

Solution

If you are courageous enough to own the Whore archetype, you can have it all. Madonna-Whore Complex no more.

Someone that’s figured that out is the Whoracle, a bad ass b*tch by the name of Amy Lombardo who left the corporate world to create a life worth living. She currently expresses her wisdom on her The Witch Bitch Whore podcast. Her philosophy is that by reclaiming the worst things people have called us, we can liberate humongous amounts of power that we use to create our wildest, coolest, most amazing lives. She’s also coming out with a coaching program The Witch Bitch Whore Effect that I think every modern woman should take.